Saint Or Sinner Read online

  One morning he presented himself at the usual time but seemed more than a little preoccupied, allowing her to make most of the conversation and often giving monosyllabic answers in reply. After a while she lapsed into near silence, becoming quite concerned when they paused and he didn’t enfold her in the usual passionate embrace, choosing instead to pace up and down nervously.

  “Philip? Is something the matter?”

  “Sweetheart, sit down for a moment, would you?”

  She did as he asked, blinking up at him in some confusion from her position perched on ‘their’ rock. He came to a sudden halt and then took a deep steadying breath before sinking down on one knee, and her mouth dropped open in surprise as he clasped her hand tightly in his.

  “Sarah, I know this may seem sudden but I’ve admired you from afar for so long and more recently I’ve come to care for you deeply. Would you do me the great honour of becoming my wife?”

  A lump formed in her throat as she gazed down into his handsome face, seeing hope and uncertainty battling for supremacy there, and she realised for the first time how much she’d come to love and trust him. And want him, she thought, drowning in the intensity of those piercing blue eyes with their impossibly long lashes. A huge smile lit up her face, and tears of joy welled up in her eyes and spilled freely down her cheeks.

  “Oh Philip. Of course I will …”

  And then she was wrapped in his arms and he was kissing her with a hunger she’d never experienced before, igniting a fire in her as his lips worked their way down from her throat to the exposed curve of a breast. She moaned wantonly, pulling his head in closer, and suddenly he recollected himself, setting her at arms length. He was visibly shaking, his breathing ragged.

  “Jesus, sweetheart. If we don’t stop now I won’t be able to and I intend to do this properly. Right now I need to go and ask your father’s permission, and get a date fixed for the wedding as soon as humanly possible.

  …………

  She could tell her father was both relieved and delighted at the news. He couldn’t keep from shaking Philip by the hand and patting him enthusiastically on the back, and he was very agreeable to arrangements being made swiftly, smiling at them both in a conspiratorial manner.

  “In my day a long engagement was the thing, the anticipation made a young man even keener. But I suppose if you really can’t wait …”

  Philip winked at him, a little smirk tugging at his lips.

  “I just want to get a ring safely on her finger before she has a chance to see what I’m really like, Sir. Too late to change her mind then.”

  He pressed a tender kiss to her palm, and her father smiled indulgently.

  “No chance of that, m’boy. I’m not blind, I’ve seen the way she looks at you.”

  “Father!”

  Sarah blushed prettily and both men chuckled at her outraged expression before her father went off to break the glad tidings to the rest of the household, leaving the two of them alone. Philip pulled her into his arms, staring down into her flushed face, his eyes searching hers for reassurance.

  “Is he right, sweetheart? You really do love me?”

  She reached up to stroke his cheek, her gaze unwavering.

  “With all my heart. Do you doubt it?”

  He gave a heartfelt sigh, dipping his head to capture her mouth in a passionate kiss that made her head spin, but she realised afterwards that he hadn’t actually answered her question.

  Chapter 5

  The wedding was arranged for one month hence which seemed like forever to the two of them despite her father still worrying that it showed unseemly haste. Now that they were officially engaged Philip came to visit daily, even when Sir Horace was at home, and they were finding it well nigh impossible to keep their hands off one another whenever they had the rare opportunity to be alone.

  She ached with unfulfilled desire and she knew he must be feeling increasingly frustrated also: although she had little personal experience, she gathered from overheard snippets of the maids’ conversation that it was uncomfortable for a man to be in a more or less permanent state of arousal. After much soul-searching she decided it was cruel to keep him waiting unnecessarily and resolved to talk to him that night. After all, they would be husband and wife soon, so what difference would a few days make?

  …………

  After a very pleasant dinner she waited for him on the balcony, enjoying the evening air while he and her father indulged in brandy and a cigar. Her ears pricked up at the sound of his familiar tread and then she sighed with pleasure as his muscular arms enfolded her, leaning back into his chest as he traced the shell of her ear with his tongue and tilting her head to give him easier access to her throat. His lips were warm against her skin and she felt the familiar pulse beating between her thighs as he turned her in his arms and his mouth captured hers in a long sensual kiss.

  “Mmmm …”

  It was intoxicating being so close to him and her head was swimming by the time he sat and pulled her down into his lap, nuzzling her collarbone.

  “I need to talk to you, Philip.”

  “You talk, sweetheart. I’m busy.”

  She giggled, tugging his head up so that she could look him full in the face. He huffed, grimacing in mock frustration.

  “Alright, you have my full attention.”

  “Hmmm. It’s hard …”

  His lips twitched and his silver blue eyes glinted wickedly in the moonlight.

  “It most certainly is.”

  She raised an eyebrow, a maidenly blush suffusing her cheeks.

  “Are you being vulgar again?”

  He smirked, dropping a tender kiss against her palm.

  “Only the tiniest bit.”

  She took a deep breath and looked down at the floor, mustering her courage.

  “So, here’s the thing. Philip, I don’t want to keep you waiting any longer. We’ll be husband and wife in a few days anyway so if you want me now, tonight, I’m yours.”

  She was aware of her face flushing crimson with embarrassment, but he tipped her chin up so she couldn’t avoid his eyes and she saw the love and desire shining in their glittering depths. There was a brief flash of something else too. Vulnerability, maybe?

  “Sweetheart, I’d be lying if I said it was easy waiting. God knows it’s all I can do to restrain myself most of the time, but I want to do this right. The first time I make love to you should be on our wedding night when we can take our time, spend hours enjoying each other with no interruptions. I will, however, look forwards to tumbling you on the chaise longue very soon afterwards.”

  He flashed her a lascivious grin and then fell serious again.

  “Sarah, some things are worth the wait. It’s only for a few more days after all, and I’ll survive even if I am beating it down with a big stick.”

  She slapped his arm, not so naïve she didn’t know exactly what he was referring to. She’d seen horses together, after all.

  “Philip!”

  He quirked a teasing eyebrow at her.

  “Acting all demure, sweetheart, after the offer you just made me? Hmmm, maybe it’s not just me who’s desperate. After all, I am fairly irresistible, aren’t I?”

  He pouted attractively and she snorted a laugh, all the time thinking he wasn’t too far off the mark. She had to admit she was nervous about what to expect, but she knew he’d be gentle and she was more than ready to be a wife to him in the fullest sense of the word.

  ………….

  Lying in bed later that night, sleep proved elusive. She was hot and restless, struggling to relax as she tossed and turned, battling with the sheets. For some strange reason she couldn’t get The Saint out of her mind, wondering if he knew about her recent engagement and if he’d make contact again. What would she do if he repeated his indecent proposal? She shivered at the memory of his burning kisses and hoped she’d have the strength to refuse his amorous advances, despite the fact that there was something dangerously fascinating about
him.

  Willing herself to drop off, she wondered why she was even thinking about another man now, however intriguing he might be. She loved Philip more each day, couldn’t wait to become his bride and share his bed. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach at the prospect and she gave up on sleep for the time being, deciding to go and get a milky drink from the kitchen in an effort to help her drop off.

  It was well after midnight but there were raised voices coming from Sir Horace’s study and she froze at the bottom of the stairs, wondering if she might stumble on anything useful. She didn’t recognise the gruff tones of the other man but as she strained her ears to hear, the conversation took an interesting turn.

  “I’ve no reason to doubt the information, Sir; I have it on very good authority. Apparently they know about tomorrow night’s arrangements and plan to intercept the goods. Yet again. He definitely has a spy in our camp.”

  Sarah shrank back against the wall hardly daring to breath.

  “Damn the man to hell, William. We’ve barely managed to keep hold of a consignment for the last year or so, and none of the locals are willing to betray him because they reap most of the benefits. What does he get out of it, that’s what I’d like to know!”

  “I suspect it’s a personal grudge against you, Sir. But all his men are fiercely loyal and even they don’t know his true identity. Nobody does, it appears.”

  “No matter. If we can arrange things properly, he’ll soon be in the hands of the Excise men and I’ve got them practically in my pocket. They’ll lock him up and throw away the key.”

  Sir Horace chuckled vindictively, a sound that made her blood run cold. There was only one man they could be referring to and she knew she had to do something to save him, whatever the consequences. She crept back upstairs to her room and paced up and down for a while, deep in thought. How could she get a message to him? One of the servants was her best hope. She would talk to Mary, her personal maid, first thing in the morning.

  ………….

  As luck would have it, Mary was to prove very useful in her venture. Sarah brought the subject up tentatively as the maid was brushing her hair.

  “Do you … um … happen to know anything about a man they call The Saint?”

  The young woman raised an eyebrow but continued with her work.

  “What’s your interest, my lady?”

  She decided to take a chance.

  “Can I trust you, Mary? I fear he may be in grave danger.”

  The maid’s jaw dropped and Sarah could read the concern in her eyes.

  “What kind of danger, ma’am? My brother is one of his men, I can get a message to him today if need be.”

  Sarah stood and took her by the hand.

  “Oh, thank God. Let him know Sir Horace is aware of tonight’s plans and is plotting an ambush. Don’t waste any time, go right away. I can finish dressing on my own.”

  Mary squeezed her fingers reassuringly.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure he gets the warning.”

  She made as if to leave and then turned back for a second.

  “Have you met him then, my lady? He’s reputed to be very handsome, even in the mask.”

  Sarah looked down at the floor, afraid she might give herself away.

  “I have. He once escorted me safely home.”

  The maid clasped her hands together, a dreamy expression on her face.

  “Oh, how romantic. I imagine he was the perfect gentleman.”

  She sighed expressively and Sarah blushed, recalling their last conversation.

  “He was the very model of propriety. And yes, he is rather … appealing. Now don’t delay any longer, Mary. I won’t be able to rest until I know he and his men are safe.”

  Chapter 6

  With anxiety as her constant companion she couldn’t settle to anything for the rest of the morning, desperate to hear that the warning had been safely passed on. Philip was away on business and wasn’t expected back that day and she still wasn’t confident enough to go riding on her own, so she had very little to distract her from her fears. She picked up a book but after reading the same page several times over she dropped it back down onto the table and gazed out of the window, lost in her thoughts.

  Why did it matter so much to her that he would be safe? She told herself it was because of the good work he did and the fact that he was a thorn in Sir Horace’s side, but in her heart of hearts she knew it was more than that. She couldn’t bear the thought of not seeing him again, she wanted to be held tightly in his arms and feel his lips on hers one last time before he was lost to her forever.

  ………….

  It was mid-afternoon before Mary reappeared, tapping gently on the door before quietly sliding in. Sarah’s breath caught in her throat but the maid nodded reassuringly, walking across the room to clutch her outstretched fingers.

  “It’s done, my lady.”

  Sarah let out a long shuddering breath, almost weak with relief.

  “Oh thank God. Are you quite sure?”

  “Positive. And I’ve got something here that’ll prove it.”

  Mary smiled, withdrawing a sealed envelope from her pocket and handing it over.

  “I want to thank you, my lady. On behalf of my brother and all the others.”

  She squeezed Sarah’s hand in gratitude.

  “You’re most welcome. It was just good fortune that led me to the information, and thank God it did.”

  “Amen to that. Now, I’ll leave you alone to read your letter.”

  She slipped out of the room and Sarah tore open the envelope with shaking fingers, inordinately curious to see what he’d written. The notepaper was expensive looking and his writing was an elegant copperplate. Clearly the man was well educated. She took a deep breath before devouring his words hungrily.

  My dearest Sarah.

  May I have leave to call you that? In truth I have thought of you in those terms since our first encounter. After what you have done for us today my men and I will be eternally in your debt, and my heart will be forever yours. I beg you to meet with me in the stables this evening, however late the hour. I shall wait all night if necessary, but I must see you.

  TS.

  She clutched the letter to her breast, her face flushed and her heart beating fast. Who would have thought he could be so succinct and yet so eloquent? She’d thought it was just a passing flirtation to him, nothing more. She got up and started to pace the room, her mind racing. How could she go to him now, knowing the depths of his feelings? And yet, how could she not? She owed it to him to break the news of her engagement in person, after all. She thought about Philip and resolved that this would be their last meeting, hoping she could resist The Saint’s devastating charm one final time.

  …………

  As bad luck would have it, Philip appeared unexpectedly in the late afternoon, claiming that his business affairs had been concluded faster than expected and he hadn’t been able to go a full day without seeing her. At first his arrival threw her into a state of high anxiety but as dinner progressed and he flirted teasingly with her throughout, she finally began to relax. He was effortlessly engaging that evening, his silver-blue eyes glinting wickedly as he played footsie with her under the table, and she was reminded of exactly why she was marrying him.

  Before he took his leave he turned to bury his face in her hair, his voice a low growl.

  “Three days, sweetheart. And then there’ll be no more need for goodbyes, and I’ll be able to hold you in my arms all night long.”

  His mouth left a trail of fire down the column of her throat and she felt the now familiar fluttering in the pit of her stomach as she moved into his warm embrace. He broke away reluctantly, kissing her tenderly on the lips before whispering in her ear.

  “Sometimes I very much regret turning down your generous offer, love. Sweet dreams.”

  Squeezing her hand, he mounted his horse and she watched him ride off into the distance before turning back into the house
to prepare for her clandestine meeting.

  ………….

  It was close to midnight by the time she made her way nervously from the silent house to the stable block, her heart in her mouth. She had no idea what she was going to say to him, but she was resolved not to succumb to his ardent advances however much her body might want to. She loved Philip far too much to allow herself to be seduced by another man, however persuasive.

  The horses whinnied quietly as she made her way past their stalls and placed the lamp on the ground, pausing to rub her mare between the ears and feeling guilty that she hadn’t exercised her that day. Without warning a pair of strong arms enfolded her, and warm lips found the sensitive skin behind her ear eliciting a sigh of pleasure. A delicious shiver of arousal ran through her as she leant back into him, feeling the vibration of his gruff northern growl through his chest.

  “I wasn’t sure you’d come, sweetheart. And yet here you are.”

  He spun her round, his lips capturing hers in a demanding kiss, his tongue taking possession of her mouth as one hand tangled roughly in her hair. She tried to fill her mind with thoughts of Philip and the sensual promise of his lips, but where her fiancé’s kisses showed admirable restraint the Saint’s were all passion and fire. Her head spun and she heard herself moan as her legs threatened to give way, the rough wood of the stall digging into her back as he pressed her up against it.

  When he finally released her she was flushed and panting and he grinned down at her, his eyes glittered wickedly behind the mask.

  “I missed you, Lady Sarah. Seems the feeling was entirely mutual, eh?”